Compare with Tacos

Tacos:
      don't compare you with friends.
      don't tell their mother that you are an asshole.
      don't tell your mother that you are an asshole.
      won't mind if you share them with friends.
      don't fall in love with you.
      don't gag.
      don't care how much meat you put in them.
      don't give you herpes.
      NEVER call you back in a month with bad news.
      don't care if you respect them in the morning.
      won't throw up in your front seat.
      won't scream so loud that it wakes up the neighbors.
      won't leave scratches on your back.      
      don't tell you that size doesn't count.
      can get away on weekends.
      don't care if you come home smelling like strange tacos.
      don't fog up your car windows.
      don't call you at home.
      won't mind if you talk about other tacos in your sleep.
      won't leave panties in your car.
      won't spit it out in the toilet.
      can handle rejection.
      won't ask you about former tacos.
      don't demand alimony when you stop eating them.
      are immune to yeast infections.
      don't yell "beat me, hurt me, bite me!!".
      never eat other tacos.
      won't make you keep eating until you get it right.
      don't get headaches.
      don't make you tell them it was great.
 You can get tacos for 55 cents a piece.       
 You don't have to be a postman to eat tacos any day of the week.
 You can eat a taco in a two seat roadster or even while driving.
 You can eat a taco and know that you're the first.
 If you don't finish a taco, it doesn't go away mad.
 You can eat a taco with your glasses on.
 You can always make a taco hot.
 A taco never tells you how to eat it.
 You can still eat a taco after you forget its birthday.
 You can breathe when you eat a taco.
 It's easy to get rid of a taco.